I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
