I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
Randomize
