paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
