Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
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