Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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