my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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