does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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