It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
