I think my grandma died before she was convinced I was straight
I showed him my bush... on skype.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
