i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
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