had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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