even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
