im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
