maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
the gays at disneyland are vicious
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
You could cut the tension with my nipples.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize
