I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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