yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
