a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Randomize
