Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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