A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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