I'm drinking while my friends build sand castles, now I know how my dad used to feel
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Speaking of roommates, Kelsey and I woke up to urine in our trash can. Neither one of us is willing to admit to it so we've come to the conclusion that someone snuck into our room in the middle of the night
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
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