i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize
