i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
