she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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