Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I'm drunk at a fancy martini bar, wearing jeans, drinking cheap vodka that I brought in my purse. Got thrown out of court for using my cell phone. All in all calling Thursday a success.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
