Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize
