dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
