It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
So vagazzling was a success
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
