I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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