Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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