I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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