His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
i believe in u and ur pee
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