Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
