PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
You called yourself Captain Aspirin and then tried to cure my headache by shoving pills up my nose. Fuck you becoming a nurse, you can't take care of me while you're drunk ever again. Ever.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
Randomize
