okay pat passed out under dana's car
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize
