It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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