I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
