So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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