all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Randomize
