Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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