Whoa Z and x make the same sound
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
