Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
Randomize
