Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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