Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize