Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives