You're a womanizer and a bitch.
I'm really into asian looking animals
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend