The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Randomize
