yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
