Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Randomize
