you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
