Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
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