remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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