I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
